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#MeetTheMindells: Six Months Out!

5/28/2014

We basically feel like we’ve done nothing this month. So this post will be shorter than most. Of course, the doing nothing is entirely our fault, as we both have been running in 100 directions and wedding decisions were the very last thing on my mind. We did check a few things off our list though, and now that we are six months out it’s like HOLY COW WE ARE SIX MONTHS OUT! So here we go…

Yellow

What We’ve Done

We sent out our Save the Dates! There is no turning back now. Word is out. It’s official. Holy CANNOLI! That’s scary.

We booked our rehearsal dinner venue! Well, it’s more of a welcome reception, actually. Since literally every single guest will be traveling for the wedding, we thought it was important to invite everyone to a little welcome celebration on Friday night. We had mixed feelings at first, as we didn’t want to have basically two weddings, but that was put to rest when we found our venue which is completely opposite of our wedding venue. Yep… it’s The Saguaro!!!!!! Did you know they hold weddings (and other activities) on their lawn? It couldn’t be more perfect for us and we are SO excited to have a super colorful pre-wedding gathering with all of our guests! I’m hoping it allows us to see everyone for more than five minutes, which I know is how it goes on the wedding day.

The Saguaro Palm Springs

We started getting rental contracts. Phew! I said in our last post that this overwhelmed me and it still does, but we are working on it!

Bridal Shower! Ok, so I’ve been 100% banished from any involvement in this (hard when you’re a control freak like me!!), but I hear plans are underway for my bridal shower in July and I hear it’s going to be at an awesome venue in Brooklyn! All I’ve been told outside of that is that it’s going to be oh-so-very Studio DIY! YAY!

We had our engagement shoot with Katie!!!!! It was so amazing! I can’t wait to share the photos with you when we get ’em back! Naz of Naz Films also made a film of the whole experience.. so that’ll be so fun to see!

Pool Party in the Desert
Photo from Katie Stoops’ Instagram

What We Need to Do

Invitations – This is a major stress source for me as a paper-freak, so we’re getting this underway early!

Attire for everyone but me! (Clearly we haven’t made any progress on it this month.) I have my dress but nobody else has anything to wear for the wedding still. We’re struggling mostly with the groomsmen. We are both very much not wanting to go the rental route, but we want everyone to look consistent… so do we buy everyone suits? OUCH! My concern with everyone wearing their own black suit (or what not) is that they’ll all be different shades of black or totally different looks altogether. I also need to get bridesmaid attire figured out! I’m working on it!

Trina Turk Palm Springs

Finish Registering. (Did you guys know West Elm just launched a registry!? WIN!!!) I’m really happy about the stuff we’ve already registered for, but I decided there are a few things we already have that could use replacing, and I feel like I’m picking pots and pans out of thin air with all the options out there! Finding the time to research has been tough.

Honeymoon – In our very first wedding post, you guys gave so many awesome honeymoon ideas! A lot of you were loving our Portugal idea, but we are realizing that we really want to honeymoon right after the wedding and Europe is generally not warm enough then. We considered Bora Bora for a bit but flights are $2k-$4k EACH! WHAT! So.. that won’t be happening. Research (and winning the lottery) are on are list for this month as well.

Beach Umbrella Meringues

How We’re Feeling

Since we didn’t do much this month, there wasn’t any decision making stress, but there was a lot of “We should be doing this…” stress. I must say, to anyone who has planned a wedding and run a business at the same time (even if you had a planner like I do!).. props to you! It is wholeheartedly overwhelming and I’m still not over how crazy the whole thing is! I think the second you get engaged you should be granted an extra “wedding hour” in every day. Am I right!? Now we are trying to carve out time to focus on it and make it more of a priority. Six months is going to go by in a FLASH!

In Over His Head

Help! (Or, Questions for You Hitched Folks!)

This question is for those of you who’ve planned weddings without any local family. While I am very lucky to have a mom who isn’t making the wedding all about her (I’ve heard some horror stories!), it is hard to keep her involved (outside of, you know, the whole funding it thing!) since she lives across the country and can’t come to tastings or site visits or otherwise. Do any of you have moms (or sisters or cousins) who wanted to be involved (and you wanted to involve!) but lived far away? Did you find any tasks or ways to include them?

And that’s a wrap! Hoping to have lots to update you about next month!!

17 comments

  • Erin Maree

    I am not married nor do I plan to get married in the near future (I am only 19 and happily single!). But when one of my friends was getting married she created a shared wedding board on Pinterest as her Mum lived on the other side of the country. She also included her bridesmaids, she would pin pictures of things she liked and her bridesmaids and Mum would comment on them and vice versa that way they were on the same page. In the description she added what her themes were, her budget etc. it actually worked really well and found that she could include her Mum even though she lived so far away.

    • Kelly

      Love this!!!! Such a great idea, Erin!! I’m definitely going to do this. Thanks!

  • Brittni

    The cost of plane tickets is exactly why we didn’t end up going to Bora Bora. SO expensive. But I’m sure you guys will find an amazing place to go for your honeymoon.

    Also, my mom was living in another state when we were planning our wedding and so I tried to involve her by having her do some research related stuff (and call / email vendors to ask questions, etc). I sent her a few videos when we did the big things, like tastings, etc. And then she came down a few days before the wedding and helped me with all of the flowers and tons of last minute errands.

    So excited for your wedding, Kel!

  • Heidi

    My cross-country mom definitely got upset a few times during the wedding planning process when she realized how impossible it was to involve her in a lot of decisions. The biggest example was when she couldn’t make one of my showers. What upset her was seeing pictures online (that I hadn’t even posted) before I’d had a chance to call and give her the blow by blow of the day’s activities. Phone contact, even when it feels like you don’t have the time, was a big helper for helping my mom feel included. 🙂

    • Kelly

      Definitely. It’s so hard having everyone so far! I’m doing my shower on the east coast for that reason. We talk often on the phone about the wedding, and I agree it’s important to make time even when I don’t have it!

  • Tiffanie

    Hey lady. Love all the photos! One way to include your mother and others is to give them something to create for the day. The place cards? The centerpieces? The wedding favors? I know you are most likely the most craftiest lady in the Lanza family, so maybe you won’t be able to let go of the reins on those things. Maybe send your mom on some kind of hunt for something that you need but can’t find yourself. These kinds of things make my mother SO happy! 🙂 xoxo

  • Kira

    We were first interested in Bora Bora but now we’re looking at the Maldives – have you researched honeymoons there at all? It has a similar feel but airfare is a bit less expensive.

    As for including families from far away, right after we got engaged, I gave both of our mothers a copy of “The New Jewish Wedding” by Anita Diamante – it’s obviously specific to Jewish weddings, but I’m sure there are any number of comparable books for other traditions. This has given us some fodder for conversation to discover what is important to all of us to include in our wedding ceremony. My mom has been eager to take on projects; right now it’s collecting decor items like milk glass, brass figures, and a few other things, eventually I’m sure she will be glad to help with more crafty things but we’re not on those projects yet. My dad (who is a graphic designer) is going to help us with stationery, but his favorite project so far has been helping us with our reception playlist! He told me he keeps a list on his phone and adds to it often. My FMIL (who is not as crafty) took it upon herself to plan us an engagement party, which is next weekend, I can’t believe it! We’ve also been asking all of our family members to collect and forward along photos from all of the couples in our families to display at the wedding.

    • Kelly

      I’ve always dreamed of doing the Maldives but it seems SO far and we both hate flying. Ha!

      I love that you gave them both wedding books, that is so smart. Lucky that you have a dad as a graphic designer, fun that you are involving him in the stationery!! So great to see how involved your family is. I can’t wait to see your wedding!!!!

  • Heather Smoke (Curly Girl Kitchen)

    I’m in the midst of wedding planning too – ours is 3 months away (September 1) – so I totally relate to everything there is to do and how overwhelming that can be! I have no family in the area, so I agree that it’s hard to find anything that my mom or sister can be involved in from a distance, (we’re also paying for the wedding ourselves, so there’s no financial involvement from my parents either) so I’m doing all the creative projects myself. My mom will be coming out a week early and will help me do the last minute alterations on my dress, but other than that, I haven’t been able to think of anything to ask them to help with, since all the projects that need doing are sitting on my dining room table. 🙂 Like another commenter, I also have a shared Pinterest board to let them check out all my ideas.

    • Kelly

      Exciting!! Glad I’m not alone in feeling this way. I definitely need to work on the shared Pinterest board, such a great idea!!

  • Lyndsay // Coco Cake Land

    awww i love every one of those photos, kelly!! that one with the kiddie pool in the desert… ?! HOT COUPLE ALERT! when we planned our wedding i had my sisters and my mom who lived in vancouver, too – so i really can’t be of much help – however, it’s so nice to keep those who are dying to be involved, involved – even if it’s an email with some colours and favour ideas and asking for opinions (even if you’ve already made up your mind! 😉 PS – i cannot wait to see pics of your bridal shower! eeks!! happy 6 months to go planning, you guys! xoxo

  • Lauren

    Hey I saw that you were having some difficulty deciding on a honeymoon destination and there’s this great place that I’ve been meaning to check out. It’s in Brazil and you can find the details at http://uxua.com/casas/quintal-da-gloria. I wish you guys luck with everything that’s going on 🙂

    • Kelly

      Thanks Lauren! That place looks AMAZING! We’ll definitely look into it!!!!!

  • Cindy

    What to do about the groomsmen!

    When me and the hubs got hitched two years ago we went to Mens Wear House to rent suits. Because that’s what everyone does, right? I nearly killed the sales guy. They wanted something like $200 a really cheap looking suit with ill fitting “fits everyone” pants and billowy shirts. Oh, and we would have them dropped back off the day after the wedding when all we wanted to do was unwrap presents and definitely not leave the house or see anyone! So I left the store angry and upset.

    Luckily, our MWH is in the mall. None of our groomsmen we’re suit guys so we figured might as well see how much one costs. Macy’s had a huge selection with an onsite tailor that could meet with two of the visiting groomsman + groom that day + Macy’s could mail the remaining suits directly to the last grooms man who just had to take care of alternations later. We picked out a suit that I (and the men) actually liked, opened a Macy’s account (and closed it right after) getting a 20% + whatever deal they were running discount and walked away for about $100/suit.

    The guys got a good suit (one wore it to an interview before the wedding and got the job!) and I didn’t have to worry about rushing back to return any cheap looking mens wear the day after my wedding! Win, win.

    Cheers!

    • Kelly

      That’s awesome that you were able to get such a deal!! If we bought suits for everyone, we would definitely need a price like that! =) Good to know it’s possible!!

  • whit carabillo

    hi! so when it comes to groomsmen attire, mens warehouse is definitely the spot! my husband was very particular about what he wore and what the guys wore when we got married 2 summers ago and we lucked out with MWH big time! we ended up finding great suits that cost the groomsmen about the same it would have cost to rent a tux. they wore their own shoes and we bought the guys their shirts and ties as a thank you for being part of our wedding. it was a win win for everyone!

    good luck with it all! 🙂

    *whit

  • Yun

    Congrats on your engagement…those engagements shots look like they are going to be killer! For groomsmen attire, how about black vests and pants or a mix of black suspenders and vests if you are looking to save money but still want a really cool put together look all in the same color scheme. There are a growing number of stylish and affordable alternatives to the rental tux route for groomsmen these days. Would love to help you out with stuff from my line if I can! xx =)

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